Wednesday, January 23, 2008

An end to the harassment

So I don't blog. Anyone who knows me, realizes that I'm not one to freely talk about emotions, nor am I one to be patient enough to download all those pictures/videos. My lack of emotion and patience makes me who I am.

Anyways through all the pressure I thought I would add my own two cents. I do believe Gilad and I have been having a bit of a rough time as of late. Neither of us are drawn to the idea of routine, so the Monday - Friday 9-5 (or rather 1-9 for us)thing, really isn't...our thing. Also, the dogs have been a ton of work and so we have found that we have become a boring old couple as of late and that is just totally depressing. We are young and now is the time to enjoy life, but instead we just want to go home and watch t.v. Really, its just sad.

I have never been through so many ups and downs, in such a short time. I feel as if I can never be consistently happy or consistently unhappy, which can be good or bad depending. Either way it can be totally exhausting. Sometimes I just wish we either totally liked it or totally disliked it here. What I keep telling myself is that just because this is an amazing experience that doesn't mean that it has to be an easy experience. Gilad and I have been challenged in so many ways in our short time in Korea. I don't think we ever expected to miss our friends and family as much as we do. Not to say that we didn't think we'd miss everyone, but the feelings are much stronger than we anticipated. Gilad put it best when he said that while we might make friends here they can never replace the ones we have back home. This has made it difficult for us to meet people who can compare but on the flipside we now recognize how important our friends and family are to us. Saying all this we have met some incredible people here who we have shared many good experiences with, foreigners and Koreans alike. People come and go so quick here, but the simple fact that we are sharing new experiences in a new country amplifies each memory.

As Gilad and I are both passionate people, we find it very important to do the things in life that are meaningful rather the ones that are the easiest or reap the most benefit. That has been another barrier we have had to face. Not being passionate. We are not passionate to teach kids and in addition to that we have no outside source to contribute to. We cannot volunteer and so we go to work, come home, go to work, go out with friends, repeat. This has made me very excited to be able to go home and choose a job that I think would really interest me now that I know what it is like to work a job just for the money. Money is not important enough to me to sacrifice my spirit.

P.s. Just a little sidenote. Since I have become an English teacher I have noticed my English skills retract. I can no longer spell simple words such as doctor (once spelled docter) and I have a limited vocabulary that makes me sound less than smart.

Anyways that is my input for now. We can have such difficult days, but then when you step back and look at the big picture, you see all the things you have learned about yourself and all of the opportunities you wouldn't otherwise get. I must say that going to Tokyo and the Philippines is keeping me motivated. I get to see two other places and enjoy another culture, even if it is just for a short while. Oh and while having dogs can be time consuming, frustrating, tiring and expensive, it pretty much is the best thing ever. They are ridiculously cute(so much so that sometimes we forget that they are actually real) and just such good companions. We will be posting some more videos and pictures of them sometime soon!
- DAWNA DAWNA DAWNA DAWNA DAWNA (just incase Gilad didn't see my name)

6 comments:

backwerd said...

Gilad, what a strange post for you to put up..

Gilad & Dawna said...

It's amazing how the most menial jokes keep you amused Drew. It's a talent really.

Anonymous said...

At least you can physically take your anxiety out on the Koren Children in class.



wait...can you still beat children in Korea?


Appropriate?

yes? no?

Okay.

Sweet/


W

Chris Whitler said...

I understand what you're saying but even in my sweet kind of work, it can feel like drudgery...believe it or not. Again, I hear you but you have lots of time to enjoy life. Sometimes, Amie and I find ourselves with the mind set that "if we can just get through all this junk, then we can really relax and enjoy things." This is a trap. Life is now. While it's called "today" is the time to soak it up. We've let so many moments go by waiting for things to get better. Old people can have fun too (in fact, it kinda gets better if you let it).

I know this is true of me, I can tend to think about the story of my life in the same way most movies happen. There is a beginning with relative happiness, a middle with conflict and an end that gets resolved. But I have to continually remind myself that there are all these things happening at the same time in different dynamics of my life. I live continually with things beginning, conflict happening and other things resolving all at the same time.

The key for me is taking time to reflect so you have a context to set your life in. To take time to be quiet and listen. To listen to your heart, to God's heart...to write and be thankful. Otherwise, it floats by.

And by the way, there's lots of time to do it all...we're going to live forever. Ah yeah.

Beth said...

Dawna,
You most definitely can blog! Thanks for sharing so openly. The frustrations you are feeling are absolutely understandable and I admire you both for sticking it out. Yeah, I'd agree with just keeping an eye out for what's good about today and where you are (like the doggies). Vent when you need to, but give thanks continually.
We miss you too!
Beth

Anonymous said...

You guys really know how to be inspirational. Have we told you how much we miss you? It's that kind of mentality that we love to have surround us. Thanks for inspiring us, even when we are halfway across the world.

- Dawna -